Commander Tartar

The Telephone, also known as Commander Tartar during the final boss fight, is the main antagonist in Splatoon 2's Octo Expansion.

Appearance and traits
In its telephone form, it appears as an old-timey telephone box. It frequently uses slang, but also has error messages inside brackets appear in its speech, possibly because it cannot find the correct slang, given that one of the error messages it prints reads [SLANG_NOT_FOUND]. Once Agent 8 has collected all 4 of the thangs, it connects its telephone body to the thangs, transforming itself into a blender. During the final boss battle, it appears as the telephone box with turquoise ooze seeping out, as well as an Octarian tentacle poking out and no longer speaks in slang or error messages. Being an AI, Tartar does not have any major personality traits, though appears to have a hate for what he would deem the less important things in life, such as fashion, sports, etc., and lets Agent 8 know as much before the final boss fight, saying it was "disgusted" by Inkling (and Octoling) culture.

Octo Expansion
The Telephone initially appears as an ancient-looking public telephone in the Deepsea Metro. It provides Agent 8 with two items:
 * 1) The CQ-80, a device through which they control which Deepsea Metro station to go to next.
 * 2) The CQ Card, which holds the CQ Points used to enter missions and revive if failing.

The Telephone then tells Agent 8 about the promised land that awaits them outside of the Deepsea Metro, and informs them that they must collect 4 thangs in order to return. Upon gathering all 4 thangs, however, they actually form a massive blender. The Telephone then tries to grind up Agent 8 and Cap'n Cuttlefish into raw materials, only to be stopped by Agent 3, with the Telephone seemingly broken.

During a lengthy escape, the Telephone attacks Cap'n and Agent 3, eventually hijacking the latter's mind into tying up Cap'n and attacking Agent 8. Their hijacked mind is broken when Agent 3 is defeated by Agent 8.

Following the defeat and Agent 8's escape above the surface, a gigantic stone statue emerges. In the hollowed out eye of the statue, the telephone appears and introduces itself as Commander Tartar and declares its intent to eradicate and recreate all life on Earth. The Commander activates a weapon from the statue's mouth; a massive cannon that threatens to destroy the entire world if fully charged.

Agent 8 manages to put a stop to it by inking the entire surface (with the assistance of Marina's Hyperbombs), blocking off the statue's source of power: sunlight. Despite this, the cannon is still able to fire, but is stopped by Pearl's voice-enhanced Killer Wail, with Tartar destroyed along with the statue.

Backstory
Commander Tartar is an AI created by a human scientist referred to only as "the professor" 12,000 years before the events of Splatoon 2. Its purpose was to pass down all of humanity's knowledge to the next capable species. The professor's intention to do so was to prevent the next intelligent species from repeating the same mistakes that lead humanity to extinction. But due to spending all those years isolated and alone, the AI's thought process ended up going in a different direction.

Commander Tartar initially saw hope in the Inklings and Octarians, but eventually became repulsed by their evolution, needless wars, and fashion obsession, ultimately concluding that they were unfit for its knowledge and reprogramming itself to create a new form of life that would be worthy of its patronage, while annihilating the existing lifeforms on Earth. The Sanitized Octarians are its creations, spawned from the biomass it has collected from the remains of its previous test subjects and refined into "the perfect life".

Quotes
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🇺🇸 [[united states|us]] English
When talking to the Telephone after collecting all the thangs and choosing to enter the promised land: During the Villi Phase: During the Belly Phase: During the Intestinal Phase: }} {{collapse|
 * "Are you ready to visit the Orange S2?"
 * "This is it. Are you [ERROR] ready to ascend to the higher plane?"
 * "The Orange S2 awaits. Are you ready to join something bigger than yourself?"
 * "Congratulations, number 10,008! The door to the Orange S2 will now open!"
 * "Please, step right inside! Here we go! Do not be shy!"
 * "Blah...blah blah..."
 * "Blah...blah blah...blahhgh!"
 * "Blah...blah blah... Y...yo..."
 * "Blah blah... Y...you..."
 * "YOU! You measly scrap of seafood! YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!"
 * "Number 10,008, why are you associating with these superfluous nobodies?"

[[undefined|mx]] Spanish (Latin America)
When speaking to the Telephone for the first time:
 * "[IDENTIFICANDO AL USUARIO] [USUARIO IDENTIFICADO: 10008]" ([IDENTIFYING USER] [USER IDENTIFIED: 10008])
 * "Bienvenid@, 10 008. Tu ubicación actual es: Estación central del Metro abisal" (Welcome, 10,008. Your current location is: Deepsea Metro Central Station)
 * "Mi función primordial es facilitar tu viaje hacia el Orange S2. Mucho gusto." (My primary function is to facilitate your journey to the Orange S2. Nice to meet you.)
 * "[CALCULANDO EFICIENCIA DE COMUNICACIÓN...] [EFICIENCIA: 12.42%] [CARGANDO MODULO: JERGA JUVENIL]" ([CALCULATING EFFICACY OF COMMUNICATION...] [EFFICACY: 12.42%] [LOADING MODULE: JUVENILE JARGON])
 * "¿Qué hubo, mi cuate y/o cuata? ¿Te latiría ir al Orange S2?" (What's happening, my dude and/or dudette? You dying to go to the Orange S2?)
 * "Es evidente que no sabes ni qué onda. Por lo tanto, te platicare. ¡Chécalo!" (Evidently, you don't know what's the rage. So, I'll blab about it. Check it!)
 * "Llevas un buen sumergid@ en la oscuridad. Desconoces lo que está en la onda." (You've been well submerged in the darkness. You don't know what's all the rage.)''
 * "¡El Orange S2! Una utopía bien chévere y rebosante de luz. ¡La neta!" (The Orange S2! A utopia that's fresh and brimming with light. The real deal!)
 * "Ahorita te llevo a este Orange S2. JA JA JA. Caíste. (I'm going to take you to this Orange S2 right now. HA HA HA. Gotcha.)
 * "Solo los chavos y/o chavas que [ERROR] su destreza llegarán al Orange S2. (Only the guys and/or gals that [ERROR] their skill shall arrive at the Orange S2.)
 * "¡Pero no te esponjes!" (But don't get your knickers in a bunch! )
 * "Hasta ahora se han apuntado 10 007 participantes. ¡Contigo podrían ser 10 008!" (As of now, 10,007 other participants have joined. With you, it could be 10,008!)
 * "¡Será una experiencia [ADJETIVO_COLOQUIAL] que cambiará tu vida para siempre!" (It'll be a [COLLOQUIAL_ADJECTIVE] that'll change your life forever.)
 * "El punto de partida para viajar hacia el Orange S2 es esta estación central." (The starting point to travel to the Orange S2 is this central station.)
 * "Para empezar, te entrego un Orange S2 y un Orange S2 (To start, I'll give you a Orange S2 and a Orange S2.)
 * "Los vas a usar constantemente. Procura no perderlos o estarás [ERROR]." (You're going to be using them constantly. Make sure not to lose them or you'll be [ERROR].)
 * "Si dispones de una superficie reflectante... ¡Ahí te ves!" (See you later, alligator! )

Translation Notes
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[[undefined|nl]] Dutch
When speaking to the Telephone for the first time: (gray) (Good morning, number 10.008! Welcome to Orange S2! I will guide you on your journey to the Orange S2! It is my an honor! Just for the for confirmation... Is it right that you are here to travel to the Orange S2?) (...) (You seem somewhat confused... That is no problem! Let me give you a short explanation. Seeing that you are down here, you probably heard about the Orange S2. A garden full of light... Full of everything the descendants of the deep dream about... And it is your lucky day, because you may travel to the Orange S2 now! There have been 10.007 lucky ones up until now, so you are number 10.008. This is a unique chance to make something from your live! So once again welcome to Deepsea Central, the starting point of your journey.) (Here you go. This are your Orange S2 and your Orange S2. You need them both, so make sure you don't lose them! So... Time to get in and to depart!)
 * "gray"
 * "Goedemorgen, nummer 10.008! Welkom op Orange S2! Ik zal je begeleiden op je reis naar het Orange S2! Het is mij een genoegen! Nog even ter bevestiging… Klopt het dat je hier bent om af te reizen naar het Orange S2?"
 * "Je lijkt enigszins verward… Dat is geen enkel probleem! Laat mij je een korte uitleg geven. Aangezien je hier beneden bent, heb je vast weleens gehoord van het Orange S2. Een tuin vol licht… Vol met alles waar de diepzeebewoners van dromen… En je valt met je neus in de boter, want je mag nu naar het Orange S2 reizen! Er zijn tot nu toe 10.007 gelukkigen geweest, dus jij bent nummer 10.008. Dit is een unieke kans om iets van je leven te maken! Dus nogmaals welkom in Diepzee Centraal, het startpunt van je reis."
 * "Alsjeblieft. Dit zijn je Orange S2 en je Orange S2. Je hebt ze allebei nodig, dus zorg dat je ze niet kwijtraakt! Zo… Tijd om in te stappen en te vertrekken!"

After collecting a thang: (Congratulations! You have found the first Orange S2! Collect all four to go to the promised land! Keep searching!) (Congratulations! You have found the second Orange S2! You have found Orange S2 of them! Truly a magnificent exemplar. Keep it up!) (Congratulations! You have found the third Orange S2! When you find another Orange S2, you can go to the promised land! I believe in you!) (Congratulations! You have found the last Orange S2! Oh dear! I honestly have to say that I didn't know if you would succeed!) (Right, I will guide you to the Orange S2! This way, please!)
 * "Gefeliciteerd! Je hebt het eerste Orange S2 gevonden! Verzamel ze alle vier om naar het beloofde land te gaan! Blijf zoeken!"
 * "Gefeliciteerd! Je hebt het tweede Orange S2 gevonden! Je hebt de Orange S2 al gevonden! Werkelijk een prachtig exemplaar. Ga zo door!"
 * "Gefeliciteerd! Je hebt het derde Orange S2 gevonden! Als je er nog Orange S2 vindt, kun je naar het beloofde land! Ik geloof in je!"
 * "Gefeliciteerd! Je hebt het laatste Orange S2 gevonden! Jeetje! Ik moet eerlijk zeggen dat ik niet wist of het je wel zou lukken!"
 * "Goed, ik zal je naar het Orange S2 leiden! Hierheen, alsjeblieft!"

After the player decided to go to the "promised land": (Congratulations, number 10.008! The gate to the Orange S2 will be opened now! Go right inside! On you go! Don't be shy!) (Collecting of material completed... Orange S2 will be started...)
 * "Gefeliciteerd, nummer 10.008! De poort naar het Orange S2 wordt nu geopend! Ga maar naar binnen! Toe dan! Niet zo verlegen!"
 * "Verzamelen van materiaal voltooid… Orange S2 wordt gestart…"

During the escape phase: (Bla... bla... you... You! Miserable seafood! I will make you pay for this! Number 10.008! Why do you engage with those superfluous layabouts?)
 * "Bla... bla… bla… Bla… bla… bla… blablabla! Bla… bla… bla… yo… yo…"
 * "Bla… bla… jij… Jij! Ellendige zeevrucht! Dat zet ik je betaald! Nummer 10.008! Waarom laat jij je in met die overbodige niksnutten?"

Before and during the final boss: (I am Tartar, a form of artificial intelligence, developed by the professor... In the 12.000 years since my creation I have observed you. You walking seafood have made a lot of progress... You have acquired almost as much knowledge as the old civilization.) ( BUT! ) (You useless battles for territory got completely out of hand! It is because of your arrogance. Everyone only thinks about themselves... You laboratory rabbits... were the seeds which a perfect world had to be come forth from... But you turned out to be an especially huge disappointment! Come, NILS! Everything has to be ground to get the world of the humans back!)
 * "Ik ben Tartarus, een vorm van kunstmatige intelligentie, ontwikkeld door de professor… In de 12.000 jaar sinds mijn schepping heb ik jullie geobserveerd. Jullie wandelende zeevruchten hebben heel veel vooruitgang geboekt… Jullie hebben bijna net zoveel kennis verworven als de oude beschaving."
 * " MAAR! "
 * "Jullie nutteloze gevechten om grondgebied zijn helemaal uit de hand gelopen! Het komt door jullie arrogantie. Iedereen denkt alleen maar aan zichzelf… Jullie proefkonijnen… waren de zaadjes waar een perfecte wereld uit moest voortkomen… Maar jullie bleken vooral een enorme teleurstelling te zijn! Kom, NELS! Alles moet worden vermalen om de wereld van de mensen terug te krijgen!"

(Bzzzt... Make you ready to get destroyed, stupid seafood! BZZZT! You will be pulverized and mixed into cement for a new world! B-B-Zzzt... The world have to be destroyed and the dream of the professor will be fulfilled! B-Bzzzt... Give up already, number 10.008! You can never defeat NILS! B-Bzzzt... The time is here, NILS! The world has to be destroyed!)
 * "Bzzzt… Maak jullie klaar om vernietigd te worden, onnozele zeevruchten! BZZZT! Jullie worden verpulverd en gemixt tot cement voor de nieuwe wereld! B-B-Zzzt… De wereld wordt vernietigd en de droom van de professor wordt vervuld! B-Bzzzt… Geef het maar op, nummer 10.008! Je kunt NELS nooit verslaan! B-Bzzzt… De tijd is gekomen, NELS! De wereld moet vernietigd worden!"

(Number 10.008... None of my laboratory rabbits have oppose me this much... ...but now you get a little place in the perfect world of the professor! You end as a pathetic speck, 10.008... And your disgusting city will be a giant speck!)
 * "Nummer 10.008… Geen van mijn proefkonijnen heeft me zo tegengewerkt… …maar nu krijg je toch nog een plekje in de perfecte wereld van de professor! Je eindigt als een zielig vlekje, 10.008… En die walgelijke stad wordt een reuzenvlek!"

When the player defeats Tartar: (Grkk! G-g-gaahhh! Professor... Our reunion is forthcoming... Prrr-   rrr- rrt…)
 * "¡ɥɥɥɐɐƃ-ƃ-פ ¡ʞʞɹפ …ǝpuɐɐʇsuɐɐ sᴉ uǝᴉzɹǝǝʍ suO …ɹossǝɟoɹԀ …ʇɹɹ -ɹɹɹ  -ɹɹɹԀ  "
 * "Grkk! G-g-gaahhh! Professor… Ons weerzien is aanstaande… Prrr-   rrr- rrt…"

Translation Notes
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Trivia

 * Commander Tartar's name is a reference to tartar sauce, a sauce made using mainly mayonnaise, which may again reference the ooze seeping out of it. Tartar sauce is primarily used for seafood, referencing its displeasure for the evolved sea creatures and desire to annihilate them.
 * Tartar's name could also be a reference to Tartarus, a deep abyss far in the underworld in Greek mythology. It would reference how the facility is deep underwater. This may also tie into the possibility that the NILS Statue is meant to resemble the Greek god Hermes.
 * There is a similar looking telephone in Octo Canyon hanging to the side of the cabin in Tentakeel Outpost, showing signs of having rust being in a turquoise color.
 * It was confirmed in the Splatoon 2 Anniversary Famitsu interview that the "professor" Tartar was created by was also Judd's owner. This is referenced in Matchmaker Station, where the crates’ formation and patterns are based off of Judd himself.
 * Commander Tartar's "contemporary speech" mode is only present in the English and Latin American Spanish localizations of Octo Expansion. In other localizations, it wonders if Agent 8 has ever heard of the promised land out loud before explaining what it is.
 * In the NOA Spanish localization, Tartar's "juvenile jargon" mode is demonstrated with an exaggerated use of Mexican slang. The mode is already deactivated by the time Tartar reveals the NILS Statue.
 * Tartar actually hints that it is going to blend up Agent 8 in most of his dialogue.
 * The term it uses for Inkopolis, "promised land", may be actually be a reference to heaven or afterlife. It also calls the promised land a "utopia of light beyond your wildest dreams", supporting this theory.
 * When it first turns on its slang mode, it refers to the player as "home skillet". A skillet is a frying pan, a hint that Tartar is essentially going to "fry up" Agent 8.
 * It says the opportunity to pass tests to eventually get to the promised land is "one in a lifetime".
 * When Agent 8 has collected all the thangs, it asks if they are ready to "ascend to a higher plane" and "join something bigger than yourself".
 * The triumphant music that blares out from the Telephone when it assembles the thangs is in a major key, but just as the player and Cap'n Cuttlefish start to enter, it takes a eerily minor key.
 * When Agent 3's mind is hijacked by the Telephone, they have a translucent turquoise goo protruding from the side of their head. This goo may be the same substance that sanitized the Octarians seen in the Octo Expansion.
 * It may also be a form assumed by Tartar, which is somewhat consistent with his appearance during the final boss, where goo is seeping out from Tartar's telephone form.
 * The Telephone's quote "Are you ready to join something bigger than yourself?" is similar to the quote spoken by Mr. Grizz "You ready to be part of somethin' bigger than yourself?", which appears when the player visits Grizzco for the first time.
 * This could be theorized as Mr. Grizz being Telephone all along, although after Telephone is defeated, Mr. Grizz does not change, though this could be because Mr. Grizz or the Telephone in this case is using an automatic speech program, which was suggested by the developers in an interview.
 * The developers revealed that Commander Tartar seems to have come to appreciate Agent 8, finally finding a being it considered excellent, but became angry at Agent 8 when they didn't share its views.
 * This is also hinted in its dialogue where Commander Tartar questions Agent 8's association with the other characters, which implies that Commander Tartar sees Agent 8 differently from the other Inklings and Octolings: "Number 10,008, why are you associating with these superfluous nobodies?"

Names in other languages
Telephone

Tartar