Sheldon/Quotes/Splatoon 3

Media
"SRL here with info on a familiar face - Sheldon from Ammo Knights! If you already know Sheldon, then you can skip the rest of this tweet, which will be filled with as much information as it is scientifically possible to cram into 280 characters. To begin, Sheldon is known for talk-"

- @SplatoonNA on Twitter

"Sheldon returns in #Splatoon3 as the purveyor of Ammo Knights, where you can exchange Sheldon Licenses for new weapons.

Earn them by ranking up in battles or using the same weapon for a long time."

- @NintendoEurope on Twitter

"A horseshoe crab who really loves his job. Sheldon could talk about main weapons, subweapons[sic], and special weapons for hours…and he often does. He also likes to spend time polishing and cleaning his gear, and field-testing weapons in Octo Canyon. Stop by his weapons shop, Ammo Knights, when you’re ready for a new set of ink-spewing weapons to take into battle."

- Play Nintendo

General

 * "Hello, he- Oh my, is that truly the only weapon in your possession? I would love to talk your tentacles off about the stuff I've got in stock, but I'm not sure you can handle the sheer firepower at lowly level 1. Listen - I've got a plan, and it will work. Go to the orange and play some orange. Get to... let's say... orange. Then come back and see me!" - When a player below level 2 enters the shop
 * "Hello, hello! What are you in the market for today?" - When a player enters the shop
 * "I'm pleased to report my already wide selection has widened further yet. Take a look. I insist!" - When new weapons are added
 * "I admire your devotion, but you already have that weapon!" - When a player tries to buy a weapon that they already have
 * "Wondering how many Gold Sheldon Licenses you still have? Let me just look it up... Ah! You have orange left." - After the player spends a Gold Sheldon License on a weapon

Shooters

 * "The Splattershot Pro was developed for more advanced users by the same team that brought you the Splattershot! And here's a "pro" strategy for using it—deploy the Angle Shooter to limit your opponent's movement, then take advantage of the Pro's accuracy and range to splat 'em from downtown. Of course, sometimes you just want to crush your enemies with a crustacean, and that's where the Crab Tank comes in. Putting it all together is easier said than done, but this setup is built for players who dare to dream."
 * "The Jet Squelcher has boosted pump pressure to give it a range that rivals charger weapons! Like other weapons with extreme range, it doesn't offer much in the way of power. But when combined with the Angle Shooter sub, your enemies won't know what hit 'em. Because you'll be SO far away! Add the Ink Vac to the mix to suck up incoming offensives, and you have a loadout that's perfect for cool, calculating players who play it safe."
 * "For your main weapon, I present the Splash-o-matic, a weapon fine-tuned for highly accurate barrages! It may not have the ink spread or raw power of some weapons, but it more than makes up for it with rapid fire that is quite rapid indeed. Plus, when you can pin down an enemy with Burst Bombs, you don't need as much power. Simply splatter them at your leisure while they're mired in your ink. And with the Crab Tank special in your back pocket, nothing can stand in your way! Try not to laugh maniacally as you overpower the other team time and again."
 * "The Splattershot is beloved for its ease of handling and high potential. This is the latest model of the go-to weapon! Paired with Suction Bombs, you have a wonderfully stable loadout that allows you to respond to whatever the enemy throws at you. And let's not forget the Trizooka special. Let one off the leash at the right moment, and I guarantee your opponent won't forget! Is this setup a little basic? Yes! Basically one of the best setups you can have! Master the fundamentals, and you'll become a force to be reckoned with."
 * "The Squeezer is a great choice for players who want flexibility. Pull the trigger once, and you get a single high-powered shot. But holding down changes everything! Suddenly the rate of fire goes up, and the Squeezer transforms into an absolute turf-inking machine. Master both modes, and you'll barely even need the Splash Wall to shore up your defenses. But it's there for you anyway! And with a Trizooka to tame far-off enemies, this set is built for flashy fighters who are comfortable being the center of attention."
 * "If you like the L-3 Nozzlenose but find it a bit lacking in power... enter the H-3 Nozzlenose! The "H" probably stands for "heavy," but I like to think it stands for "HAHAHAHA," which is the noise one typically makes while firing it. Now, the fire rate suffers a bit compared to lighter weapons, but when you can pinpoint your enemies with a Point Sensor, you can make each shot count. And with a team all juiced up on energy from your Tacticooler, you're ready to laugh all the way to the winner's circle."
 * "The range and accuracy of the Aerospray MG aren't anything to write home about, but break out a pen and some stationery for its rate of fire! And when you pair a nimble weapon like that with Fizzy Bombs, it makes movement a breeze. You can quickly lock down plenty of turf to help support your teammates. Of course, inking turf is the name of the game, but sometimes you need a little extra OOMPH, and that's where the Reefslider special comes in. Ride it to glorious victory! This setup is ideal for players who like to mix it up—tactically pushing the front line and waiting for the right moment to go big."
 * "The .96 Gal is a shooter that hits hard and has a long range, courtesy of its large chamber and extended barrel! This thing would be an absolute cheat code if it fired just a little faster...but you can't have your crab cake and eat it too. You have to make each shot count! Still, you can set up a Sprinkler to help secure your turf...and the Ink Vac special doesn't suck. I mean, it DOES, but...you know what I mean!"
 * "Why fire once when you can fire three times? That's the question that the L-3 Nozzlenose answers. One pull of the trigger launches three rapid shots. Now, don't get me wrong. This isn't a full-auto weapon. Holding down is like pressing the "close door" button in an elevator—it does absolutely nothing! So you'll want to time your triple shots perfectly...and wait for the right moment to toss a Curling Bomb. Or, if a triple shot won't do the trick, there's always the Crab Tank! So who's this set for? Just about anyone! It's so balanced that both the freshest noobs and the crustiest veterans can find a use for it."
 * "With its wide muzzle, the Sploosh-o-matic is well suited for close-combat situations. And escorting you to those close-combat situations is the Curling Bomb! Let one loose, and it'll lay down a proverbial red carpet to your foes' feet. Combined with the Ultra Stamp's forward rush, you have one powerful setup for players who love getting up close and personal—or who want to blaze a path forward for their allies."
 * "The .52 Gal is a heavy hitter with an extra-large nozzle for shooting massive amounts of ink. Of course, all that power comes at the expense of fire rate...which is why you'll want the Splash Wall to hide behind while reloading. And if the other team is playing it a little too safe, you've always got the Killer Wail 5.1. Lock on and blast 'em with lasers! So if you're the type to hang back and wait for just the right moment, this loadout is for you."
 * "The N-ZAP '85 is a shooter with excellent ink efficiency and rapid-fire capability! And, um...its power is certainly... adequate. Sorry—I hate to say anything negative, but this weapon doesn't pack the biggest punch. But that's OK! It's fast enough to send your enemies scrambling...and that's when you hit 'em with the Suction Bombs. Fire up the Tacticooler to energize your squad for a big push, and you've got a nimble loadout that's built for teamwork. It's what makes the dream work!"

Rollers

 * "The Splat Roller represents the roller class of weapons that excel at close combat and inking turf. With any roller, you can tap to fling ink, or hold  down as you run to lay down a path of inky goodness. Try using your Curling Bombs to sneak up close to an enemy, and then...PLOOSH! Get 'em with the roller. It's oh so satisfying. As an added strategic wrinkle, you have the Big Bubbler to rally your team to the front line at just the right moment. If you're new to rollers, I can't recommend this loadout enough. Who knows? Maybe you'll become a roller for life!"
 * "The Carbon Roller is a lightweight roller built using low-density parts for increased handling! Of course, lightweight leads to light inking capability, but if you can find an opponent with an Autobomb and then sneak behind them, it'll get the job done. Rounding out this zippy little loadout is the Zipcaster, which can also help you surprise and undelight your opponents. Basically, if you want to be a ninja, try out this set!"
 * "The Flingza Roller is a wild one. Its shape changes depending on whether you swing it vertically or horizontally! I won't get too technical, but the automatic centrifugal clutch allows for light horizontal swings that go FLOOSH and heavier vertical swings that are more like GLOMP! The bottom line is that you can control the action. Use the vertical swing to lay down a path, then take down nearby opponents with the quick strike of a horizontal swing. While you're zipping around, you can also lay down Ink Mines to help sniff out opponents and fire off some Tenta Missiles for a one-two punch. If you're up to the challenge of simply dominating a match, then you should give this set a try!"
 * "The Dynamo Roller is a roller I designed myself using a power generator for high strength and long range! Now, I wasn't able to reduce the weight on the motor as much as I would have liked, but this thing can REALLY spill some ink, if I do say so myself. Pair it with the Sprinkler sub, and you can push forward to apply max pressure to the other team. And what will your team be doing, you ask? Why, relaxing and enjoying sweet, sugary sips from your Tacticooler, of course. You'll be the most popular teammate around!"

Chargers

 * "The E-liter 4K Scope delivers the long-range action of the 4K model with a scope for added accuracy! Though it boasts a shot range that beats almost every other charger, you'll want to be extra aware of your surroundings when scoping in. Unlike the E-liter 4K, the scoped configuration won't let you store a charged shot, so keep that in mind as you adjust to the feel of using a scope. It comes with the same Ink Mines and Wave Breaker special as the base E-liter 4K, so you can apply the same strategy—stay safe while you zoom in and splat unsuspecting foes!"
 * "Ah, the Classic Squiffer. For a charger, it's a bit short on range, but in return it can charge up much more quickly. That allows you to use it in a more offensive way! I mean...being on the offense. Not that the weapon is offensive...except to your opponents. Anyway, I'd take advantage of the Point Sensor sub to coordinate an attack with my teammates. And if my home turf was invaded, I'd deploy the Big Bubbler and hide inside, using that Classic Squiffer action to snipe enemies. Comfy in close range with a charger? This set is for you!"
 * "Simply put, the Splat Charger is a charger-type weapon designed for long-range offense. Its operation is standard—hold down to charge up ink, then release  to fire it all out at once, inking a long path in an instant! Ah, but here's a key difference...the Splat Charger can actually hold its charge for a short period while you swim. Tactically speaking, that's a game-changing advantage! And with Splat Bombs to flush out hiding enemies and the Ink Vac to turn the tables on invaders, this set is impressively well-balanced. I recommend it for anyone who's looking to eventually master the charger category of weapons!"
 * "The Splatterscope is a Splat Charger with an added scope for more effective long-distance aiming. It's great for hitting far-off targets, but your view is narrow while charging, so be extra careful! Also, that fancy scope takes up space, so something had to go. In this case, we had to nix the ability to store your charge. But hey, if you like to stay safe and shoot from afar, this could be the charger for you! When you're not scoping and sniping, you've also got Splat Bombs and the Ink Vac at your disposal, so this is a more balanced set than it would appear. Give it a try!"
 * "With its pressurized polymer construction, the E-liter 4K has a remarkably long range, even for a charger! To get the most out of it, you can set Ink Mines for opponents who get too close, then use the Wave Breaker special to reveal those who are slinking around in the ink. Still, this set is all about long-range accuracy, and in the right hands, it will definitely hit the target. I hope it goes to a good home!"
 * "The Bamboozler 14 Mk I is a tribute to a weapon used by the leader of the famous Squidbeak Splatoon, but retooled for the battles of today! I've used bamboo in my version to remain faithful to the original design, but as a trade-off, it can't store a charged shot. Is it the most powerful charger? No. Is it the most mobile charger? Also no. But with "good enough" power and charging speed, I think this is a compromise that WORKS. Plus, when you have Autobombs to sniff out enemy positions, you can put yourself in the perfect spot to charge up and attack! For the coup de grâce, activate your Killer Wail 5.1 and take a moment to pay tribute to the legendary leader who inspired this weapon."
 * "I debuted this weapon before, but I'm as proud as ever of the Goo Tuber, a charger with the upgraded ability to store your charge even longer! It offers high-pressure ink storage for extended periods, allowing you to stay submerged while you wait for the perfect shot! In exchange, it takes a bit longer to charge, but this baby can even store a partial charge, giving you the ultimate in flexibility. For instance, while you use a Torpedo to reveal enemy positions, you can be comfortably charging away in a safe spot. Then, when you're ready to ink 'em up, zip to the most advantageous spot and snipe away! If you miss, you have Tenta Missiles in your back pocket to finish the job. If you want to take your strategy to the next level by storing charges and taking advantage of each stage's unique terrain with your mobility, this set is for you!"

Sloshers

 * "Even if you've never lobbed a blob, it's not against blob law to use the Bloblobber! What's more, each lob fires four blobs—that's an awful lot of lawful blobs! Once your tongue is untied, you can use the Bloblobber to target a single enemy—perhaps your friend Rob—or an entire mob. Truly, it's a versatile weapon for every job. And although they sound out of place here, the Sprinkler sub weapon and Ink Storm special actually complement this set quite nicely. Like butter melting over corn on the cob!"
 * "The Sloshing Machine is like a washing machine...but for getting everything filthy with ink! Each volley of beautiful, twisting ink hits its target with plenty of power and leaves a sloppy mess everywhere. It's great for covering plenty of turf. Try using Fizzy Bombs to contain the other team's movement while you dial the Sloshing Machine up to the max. The other team will be in a spin cycle before you know it! And don't forget about your Booyah Bombs—another tool in your quest to make a mess-terpiece of the field. By now it should be clear...this set is NOT for neat freaks."
 * "The Slosher is one of the most technologically advanced weapons I have had the privilege of demoing. I'm kidding! It's a bucket of ink! But that doesn't mean it can't be absolutely brutal in the right hands. See, slosher-type weapons are perfect for attacking enemies in elevated positions or hiding behind walls. They think they're safe, and then...SPLOOOSH! You can't rapid-fire a bucket, of course, but in conjunction with Splat Bombs, you can stop almost anyone in their tracks. And with the Triple Inkstrike special, you have the ability to blindside the other team before moving in for the splat. This loadout is a bucketload of fun!"
 * "The Explosher main is a reporpoised industrial heater modified to fling piping-hot ink long distances! Its shots explode on contact with walls and the ground, so it's handy for hitting foes who like to hide! And with the Point Sensor sub, you can reveal enemy positions to your allies, or queue 'em up for your own ink bath, courtesy of the Explosher. For super-slippery customers who might be slinking along in their own ink, fire up the Ink Storm and watch 'em scramble as they're revealed. With so many ways to direct the action, I recommend this loadout for all aspiring team captains!"
 * "The Tri-Slosher answers a question that nobody asked, which is..."Please let me fling three giant buckets of ink at the same time."Hey, come to think of it, that's not even a question! Anyway, since the Tri-Slosher offers a broader attack, the inkpower is a bit less than your basic Slosher. But when you've got Toxic Mist to slow enemies down, it's barely even a problem. Add in the Inkjet, and you're packing plenty of power. This is a set for sloshing away with impunity!"

Splatlings

 * "The mechanics of the Heavy Splatling are similar to those of a charger, but it's in a weapon class of its own! Hold down to compress your ink, and then release  to unleash a monster stream! Now, as you might expect, each charge takes a while to get ready and uses a huge amount of ink, leaving you wide-open while you wait. That's why the Sprinkler is a great sub weapon here. It'll help your turf stay inked and keep a little distance between you and your enemies. The pro move is to fire up your Wave Breaker to expose enemy locations while the Heavy Splatling charges up. Then it's open season from way downtown! With power like this, even enemies with chargers will be jelly!"
 * "Ooo, let me tell you all about the new and improved Mini Splatling. Thanks to a few revisions with the firing mechanism, it charges more quickly than ever! This loadout also comes with Burst Bombs, which are excellent for inking walls, allowing you to get vertical in a hurry when the situation demands it. And speaking of situational strategy, with the Ultra Stamp as your special, you can push the front line at the drop of a splat. Try this set out if you fancy yourself a field general!"
 * "Let me introduce you to a very special weapon—this is called the Ballpoint Splatling, and it has a unique dual fire rate! Here's how it works. When you start firing, the barrel spins super fast, spraying everything around you with tons of ink. It's great for covering turf quickly. But once the spin slows a bit, the weapon transforms into a long-range ace! You can target faraway enemies with shocking accuracy. And that's not all! Sorry—I've been watching infomercials. The Ballpoint can be paused midfire to recharge. Not all splatlings can do that! Now, with all of these features, this weapon might take some getting used to, so I recommend taking it for a test run on the firing range before heading straight into battle. In conjunction with Fizzy Bombs and the Inkjet special, this loadout may not be for beginners, but it's a technical wizard's dream come true."
 * "The Nautilus 47 was the first splatling to allow you to store your charge while swimming in ink! It sounds like a small detail, but let me assure you...it's huge! It means you can charge undetected until you're ready to leap out and splat an unsuspecting opponent. Of course, this state-of-the-art weapon has a few other tricks up its sleeve as well...It can be paused midshot to charge. It has a stabilizer to keep your aim steady while you jump. And it makes an inkredible grilled cheese! Oh, I may have dreamed the last one...Anyway, with the Point Sensor sub and Ink Storm special to help read opponent positions, this loadout can make you feel like you're playing in Cod Mode!"
 * "The Hydra Splatling is designed to impose extreme pressure on your opponents' turf through superior firepower. However, because the weapon takes so long to charge, it's definitely a liability in close quarters. I recommend using your Autobombs to fend off incoming bogeys—and they can even help reveal far-off opponents who can be splatted from long range! If anyone DOES make it past your defenses, the unwelcome surprises aren't over. This loadout allows you to greet them with a Booyah Bomb! Mi casa is NOT su casa! I recommend this setup for all you homebodies who want to set up camp and never leave—supporting your team through long-range firepower instead!"

Dualies

 * "The Glooga Dualies were developed with one thing in mind—pure damage. They're not the fastest dualies, but when you pull off a sweet Dodge Roll with these in your hands, you temporarily gain the ability to fire an outrageously powerful shot! Now, while the big-shot power grabs the headlines, many people overlook the Splash Wall sub. And that's a mistake, because it actually gives you great defensive balance. Last but not least, the Booyah Bomb special has the potential to tip the scales in your favor. I hope this balanced set helps you net a lopsided victory!"
 * "The Dapple Dualies are dualie-type weapons that have been obsessively engineered for optimum mobility! They're now lighter, allowing for faster movement, but they have less range. It's a trade-off. But you know what goes well with mobility? Even more mobility! That's where the Tacticooler special shines. Blitz forward with added speed from the Tacticooler, and place Squid Beakons to help your teammates secure forward positions to take advantage of this set. It's not a hit-and-run strategy. It's more like...run-hit-run-run-hit- hit-hit-run... You get the picture."
 * "Do you know the Jet Squelcher? Would you like to have two of them? Good, because that's what Dualie Squelchers offer! If you don't know the Jet Squelcher, it features the ability to fire off extremely accurate and fairly rapid shots after executing a roll. And now you have TWO of them! Meanwhile, you can sniff out enemies with both the Wave Breaker special and your Splat Bombs. I call it the "see it, splat it" strategy. If you like to stick and move with accurate shots across a long distance, I recommend you give this loadout a try!"
 * "Here we have the Splat Dualies, a dualie weapon born from the "ink hard or get splatted trying" culture of Turf War battles! These are dual-wielding, pistol-type weapons that—let's be honest—look pretty sweet. But there's some real substance behind the style...The propulsive exhaust nozzles on each weapon allow you to perform a high-speed Dodge Roll! As a trade-off, you won't be able to move for a brief moment after executing this move. But during that time, the two weapon sights overlap, increasing your splatting power. Paired with Suction Bombs as your sub weapon, this loadout might SEEM as though it's lacking in power... then BOOM. You realize you have the Crab Tank. All hail Crab Tank!"
 * "The Dark Tetra Dualies feature four ink-ejecting nozzles that allow you to execute up to four Dodge Rolls in a row! Yes, I said FOUR! And because you can shoot while rolling, you'll be able to zip around stages with ease and roll your way to victory. This loadout also comes with Autobombs, which almost seems unfair. You can use those to chase your opponents out of hiding spots, and then swoop in with the splat. And if they slip away? Fire up the Reefslider and hunt 'em down, shark-style. I recommend this set for those who want to set up their own pincer moves and pressure the enemy!"

Brellas

 * "The Tenta Brella is... well, a big umbrella. You'd be forgiven for thinking it looks like the sort of thing you could camp in. Because that's certainly one way of using this setup! Try placing a Squid Beakon, and then opening your Tenta Brella wide for your teammates to gather behind. And if the enemy is bringing major inkpower that can penetrate the brella? Fire up the Ink Vac, and send it right back at 'em! I hope I've made it clear that this loadout is for the ultimate team player—someone who wants to protect and support their team on the path to victory!"
 * "Umbrellas help you stay dry, but Splat Brellas do that and more—like coat the battlefield and any enemies in your path with ink! Let me explain. You can spray ink normally with . But if you HOLD, the brella will open like a shield! And if you hold even longer, you'll launch the brella itself. It leaves a trail of ink, can damage enemies, and STILL protects you. It's a triple threat! Speaking of triples, this set also comes with the Triple Inkstrike and the Sprinkler sub, so I guess you could say it's got you covered."
 * "Of all the brella-type weapons, the Undercover Brella looks the most like an ordinary umbrella. And that's no accident—the weapon was designed for stealth splatting! Getting into the technical aspects, the canopy-launching mechanism has been removed here to allow for rapid fire. The weapon can even be fired while the canopy is open! Back to stealth capabilities—you can use the Ink Mine sub weapon to help scope opponent positions before sneaking in for a splat they'll never see coming. And if you're spotted? Throw all subtlety out the window, fire up the Reefslider, and ride boldly to victory! I recommend this set to all aspiring spies, especially those who know how to walk softly and carry a big shark-based motorcycle."

Blasters

 * "What can I say about the Blaster other than...it blasts. HARD. When those balls of ink explode, they can even tag enemies hiding behind walls. Now, the range isn't great, and the rate of fire leaves a little to be desired, but you can always coax an enemy out of hiding with an Autobomb, can't you? On the other hand, if you're getting charged, that's when it's time to break out the Big Bubbler. Basically, if YOU want to be the one controlling the action, this is the loadout for you."
 * "You know how blasters tend to have a low rate of fire? Not the Clash Blaster! Its speedy shots are great for keeping foes at bay! Now, it's not going to win any awards for power, but when you have Splat Bombs to corner your enemies, it'll get the job done. And if an opponent still manages to slip away? That's when you trash 'em with the Trizooka. Talk about a chaotic combo. If that sounds fun, this loadout is for you!"
 * "The Rapid Blaster lives up to its name with an improved rate of fire and modest ink consumption. Now, if you know me at all, you know I'm going to tell you about a big trade-off, and it's this: low power. But using the Ink Mine to reveal enemy positions helps make up for it. What I'd do with a combo like this is use the Rapid Blaster to create a whirlwind of ink, then take it to the next level with a Triple Inkstrike. This setup lets you focus in on key areas of the map—whether you're defending the home base or pushing an advance into hostile territory."
 * "The Rapid Blaster Pro owes its incredible range to a chamber system that delays ink oxidization to the last possible moment! With that technology in hand, try catching your enemies in a little Toxic Mist before giving them a few inksplosions as a parting gift. And if anyone gets too close? Fire up the Ink Vac, and turn their own inkpower against them! This is a set that will make the tactically inclined player veeery happy."
 * "The Luna Blaster may look cute, but its short-range exploding ink shots pack a serious wallop. If you find that your enemies are dancing just outside that range, toss a few Splat Bombs to keep 'em on their toes. And for the ones sniping you from FAR away, fire up the Zipcaster, sneak behind 'em, and...well, you know what to do from there. Really, this set is ideal for players who want to read the terrain and react to their opponents' moves."
 * "The Range Blaster delays the oxidization of ink, which extends the range before it explodes. Let that sink in. It's SO COOL how it works! Of course, you lose a little fire rate, but that's OK when you have Suction Bombs to flush out your opponents. And with the Wave Breaker at your disposal to reveal their positions, it's almost like your enemies will have nowhere to hide! I recommend this loadout to anyone who fancies themselves a master of the hunt."

Brushes

 * "The Octobrush has dense bristles that fling a thick stream of ink with each slash. It's a heavier entry in the brush weapon class, which is known for being light and nimble. But even with those heavy brush strokes, you won't be able to reach everywhere—and that's where the Suction Bombs come in. Lastly, if you're up against enemies with ranged weapons who just won't engage up close, you've got the Zipcaster in your back pocket. Zip on over and give 'em what for! This is a user-friendly loadout that's easy for beginner brushers but capable enough for true artistes!"
 * "The Inkbrush is a super-light brush weapon that lets you ink your way forward with blistering speed! There's not much room for power when you're moving that fast, but you can keep counterattacks at bay with plenty of Splat Bombs. Add the Killer Wail 5.1 to the mix, and you've got a combo that will confuse and annoy your opponents into submission! I can see it now... You blaze across battle lines...toss a Splat Bomb, and trigger the Killer Wail just in time to headbang along as the clock runs out. Whew! That's inking outside the box!"

Stringers

 * "The REEF-LUX 450 is a lighter version of the Tri-Stringer that's a bit more user-friendly for folks who are new to stringer-type weapons. Like most lightweight weapons, it doesn't pack the biggest punch or range—no exploding charged shots here—but it does offer the ability to store a charge! This set comes with Curling Bombs to help you close the gap into enemy turf quickly, letting you take full advantage of the nimble nature of your main weapon. And when you want to make a big impact in a hurry, don't forget about your Tenta Missiles. You can make it rain missiles on opponents out of range of the REEF-LUX. This is a highly mobile loadout that lets you fight with flexibility and still take down powerhouse opponents. I hope you give it a try!"
 * "I am so excited to share this new weapon tech with you. Behold the Tri-Stringer—a stringer-type weapon that fires in three directions at once! Press while standing or running, and the ink will fire horizontally. Press  while jumping for a shot that's concentrated vertically. The flexibility is unparalleled! And that's not even the best part. You can hold down  to charge a shot! The ink will fly farther AND explode if it hits a wall or the floor. I could go on all day about stringers, but I should mention that the Toxic Mist sub is great for keeping enemies at bay, or at least slowing them down. And for enemies that you can't even reach with a charged shot, you've got the Killer Wail 5.1 with supersonic range at your disposal. I hope you'll give one of the new stringers a try!"

Splatanas

 * "If you're looking for a splatana-type weapon with a bit more OOMPH, look no further than the Splatana Stamper, my friend! Now, this weapon takes a bit longer to charge than the Splatana Wiper, but the trade-off is a wider, more powerful spray of ink. It can really do some damage! Give this a try: fire off a charged slash, and follow it quickly with a horizontal slash or Burst Bombs. Not sure what they call a one-two punch in swordplay, but this is it! And with the Zipcaster special, you're practically buckling swashes! Er, swashBUCKLING. What I mean to say is you're basically a laser space pirate with elite space-pirate tech!"
 * "The Splatana Wiper is part of an entirely new category of weapons known as splatanas! These sword-like slashers can fling ink through the power of centrifugal force. To do a basic horizontal slash, just press . But you can also hold to unleash a vertical slash that will really send some ink flying! On top of that, if you perform a vertical slash while tilting  a bit forward, you'll step forward with the attack, adding enough power to flatten most foes. Paired with the Torpedo sub, you can slash across the battlefield and level your enemies with a single stroke. It's almost too good! And I haven't even mentioned the Ultra Stamp special yet. If the other team hasn't surrendered, the Ultra Stamp is sure to make 'em think twice. If you want to be among the first trailblazers in the splatana-fighting genre, this set is for you!"